This article is a version of the video transcript. AI has been used to remove pauses and clean the text.
Support TruWitness
Our mission is to reach young adults online by sharing radical video testimonies that awaken hearts to Jesus Christ, ignite hope, and inspire transformed lives.
DONATE: https://truwitness.org/pages/donate
Jesus FREED Me From Demonic Attack, Depression, & Mental Illness
My Early Life and Family Breakdown
I'm Becca, and this is my true story! I am a pastor's kid. I grew up in the church. I knew about Jesus ever since I could remember. I was born into a loving home with two parents that loved God so much. I had a close relationship with him. I would hear from him, I'd feel him all around me, and I was filled with a lot of joy as a kid.
But when I was about seven years old, my dad first started showing symptoms of getting really sick. The doctors had no idea what was going wrong with him. At the same time, my mother was getting attacked as well. She has a history of mental illness in the family, and so there were moments where she started to become distant from the family. So suddenly I lost both of my parents, one due to being incapacitated from illness and one was trying to cope with the situation.
The doctors told him he only had five years to live. My mom had her first mental break from reality, and it fractured our family forever. Around the time I was in fourth grade, she got into a car accident and broke one of her legs. The doctors prescribed her pain medication. And from that moment on, she became a victim of the opioid crisis and a very long standing addiction began. She became less and less like my mom and more and more like a stranger. I was only maybe nine years old when that happened.
The moment my mom started slipping away, I stepped into the role as mother at a very young age. So I started to bear really heavy burden that I didn't even realize was going on.
The Descent into Darkness
By the time I was 12 years old, things got really, really bad and my parents' marriage was broken beyond repair. And it broke me really, really deeply. I started to cry out and ask, God, where are you in all of this? Where are you when my mom's gone, where are you? And my dad is dying and I'm bringing him food and I'm getting my sisters up for school in the mornings, and I'm just trying to survive.
I received my first diagnosis when I was 12 years old. I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder. 12 years old was also the first time that I tried to kill myself. I was so consumed in darkness.
I was riddled with anxiety. My mind would be going a million miles a minute every single day. I couldn't look in a mirror for years because when I look in a mirror, I'd hear all of this onslaught of ugly, unworthy, stupid.
Unfortunately, when I was 14, on Christmas Eve, I found out that my grandma had passed away suddenly in her sleep. Something in me, the one thing that I was holding on to for a maternal figure when I lost that, it was like something else just snapped in me. I just got to a point where I was like, I don't care about anything anymore.
When I got to high school, I would literally start hearing voices in my head. This was very scary for me because my mom's mom had four siblings, and all four of her siblings were institutionalized for schizophrenia. So when I started hearing voices, I thought I was done for. The things they would say to me were encouraging me to end my life.
Addiction and Rock Bottom
I got introduced to alcohol at a young age. I was 14 when I first started drinking, and it was the numbing medicine that I had been wanting so badly. It was something that silenced my head, but at a price. And the price was my soul.
I first became involved with marijuana when I was 15, and that began over a decade of an addiction and led to other things. My path became darker and darker and darker.
I knew my whole life from my dad and my mom warning me, don't do psychedelics because there's a history of schizophrenia in your family and psychedelics will trigger a psychotic break. But I didn't listen.
I remember one night I had taken a specific drug and I started experiencing a real-life demonic attack. Every time I closed my eyes, I would see flashes of gruesome, violent scenes. I thought that I was gone. I thought that this was the rest of my life.
I cried out to God and I said, Lord, I need you right now because I am going to die. I'm going to lose my mind. And the Lord, in all of his grace and mercy, lulled me into a sleep, and I slept it off, which is unheard of.
But I still turned back into my sin. The addiction progressed to fentanyl. I was literally selling drugs to my mom. I was selling her psychedelics, selling her weed, and we were doing drugs together. That's how bad it got.
The Road to Recovery
When I tried to detox at my mom's house, my mom literally gives me a painkiller in the middle of my detox from pain medication, and it starts the whole process all over again.
The Holy Spirit spoke to me. And he said, you need to go to your dad's. So I went to my dad's and I said, dad, I need to tell you something. I'm detoxing right now from fentanyl and I need your help.
He and his friends came and prayed over me, and they didn't judge me. And they covered me with love. What should have been two weeks of detox? The Lord put a stop to it, and I only detoxed for five days when it should have been closer to two weeks. His mercy came through again.
Spiritual Awakening
After graduating college and starting my dream job, I still felt empty. I had everything, but I was so empty. I still had anxiety. I was still depressed. I would wake up feeling so unmotivated and just staring at a wall for hours.
Around the end of 2022, I started to go back to church. The church I was attending started a corporate fast, a 21 day fast. The Lord said, I want you to fast from all secular inputs and sugar. So I spent 21 days essentially consecrating myself for God.
During this time, watching The Chosen sparked something. It was like the Lord saying, I know your real name. I know your identity. Everyone else may call you a different name, but I see the real you and I am calling you by name.
I started studying Scripture, and there was this Bible Project playlist about the New Jerusalem, talking about heaven and earth and God's presence. It all boiled down to the fact that Jesus said, it's not just about John 3:16. It's about family. He said, my method is family. I'm reuniting my family back to myself.
When I realized that, it hit me like a dump truck. I started weeping for like, a whole day. And in that moment, he literally told me, I've healed you of depression. I've healed you of anxiety. I've healed you of PTSD.
Then I experienced a month straight of supernatural joy. I said my life is yours. I'm sold out. This is my faith. Now it's real, I feel it, and I felt that stuff break off.
Walking in Freedom
When depression tried to return, the Lord spoke to me and he said, you need to speak to the giant in your life. You need to tell them to leave, because I have healed you. You need to guard your mind and your heart with Scripture and use it as your sword.
I started to work on the offense, and I started to realize I have power and authority over these things because of Jesus Christ. I started to watch those chains crumble and hit the ground.
I've been sober for the last three years straight and I have felt alive like never before. He's surrounded me with people that truly love me, people that love God more than they love themselves.
My heart posture now is “Here I am, Lord, send me whatever you want, whatever you need, no matter what it looks like, no matter what it feels like. I trust you.” And since I've done that, it's been the greatest journey.
My Advice for Others
I would say never stop talking to God, even if you've never spoken to him before. Don't give up on just telling him everything about your life, even if it's complaining. Keep talking to him. Keep telling him about your good days and your bad days, and he will show up for you. He always does. Every single time.